I woke up missing Nick terribly for some reason, sometimes it hits me like that. Out of nowhere I’ll need him, even when I’ve grown accustomed to his absence. But I think of our life together and how well we’d do…will do…as husband and wife. It fills me with a sense of longing and nostalgia so profound I hope none of you ever have to experience it. It can be living hell.

My bedside table framed photo. Sorry for the lens flare, it was hard to photograph close-up.

It wasn’t always idyllic when he was around. He has his moods, as do I. But that’s what love’s about, true partnership even when the road is bumpy. Trusting someone to love you regardless of what you look like in the morning. Knowing someone will take care of you when you get sick, even push your wheelchair and wipe your chin if you need it…clean you, embrace you, hold your hand at the end when all that’s left is love.

I will not be denied these things with Nick. I simply will not.

Somehow I will solve this. Somehow, I will find a way to him. Losing him is not an option.

I hope you will help me as I explore my options. Please share your thoughts in comments or the guestbook. You’ll find several researched articles already posted in the archive, and photos of my Rose Suite in the gallery - those are good places to begin!

Posted in: Personal | |
Post tags: nick

No Comments »

No comments yet.

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URL

Leave a comment