I explained in the “Ever Wedding” article that I do have a plot with headstone for Nick, but it is obviously empty. In fact, I don’t even consider it anything other than a tiny piece of pointless real estate in a plain Tacoma cemetery. Someday, God willing, he’ll occupy it properly – alongside me, since I bought enough for four. This was either a colossal act of optimism on my part or a colossal waste of money, or perhaps both.

My thinking at the time (I purchased the plot in 2003) was I would be reunited with Nick, we’d have children, and we could all be buried together when the time was right. I didn’t have any special number of children guesstimated; I could only afford to buy a total of four. Even then, I borrowed most the money from my parents, since so much of mine was still tied up in condo expenses. Believe me, it was hard to ask my parents (who aren’t exactly wealthy, though they’re not poor) for cash for an empty burial plot that may or may not ever be used. At least, in a worst case scenario, I can sell the plot.

With the exception of checking the headstone after its installation I have never even visited the site. I’m not sure if any of his family has, either. His aunt and uncle were the only people he was still in touch with at the time of his disappearance, and even then it was infrequent contact. As I wrote on Nick’s Scrapbook, his parents never responded to my letter telling them Nick’s fate, so it’s safe to say they haven’t visited.

I did put a lot of thought into the design of the headstone, and was given access to the monument maker’s software to pull together elements I liked. I took into account that we may share the plot someday, so I wanted it to be something we’d both be proud to lie beneath. Here’s a screen shot of the design.

I thought the quote was particularly appropriate.

Posted in: Personal | |
Post tags: nick

6 Comments »

1. Nothing wrong with being optimistic! I think it’s a nice though.

   Comment by corrin — April 17, 2009 @ 6:20 am

2. I like the quote!

   Comment by Scott Thurston — April 17, 2009 @ 7:16 am

3. hmmm … the quote kinda reminds me of Independence day!

   Comment by Linda — April 17, 2009 @ 7:30 am

4. i like the quote too.

   Comment by cady — April 17, 2009 @ 4:01 pm

5. It’s always good to be optimistic. I always say, what do you have if you can’t have hope?

   Comment by Sadie — April 17, 2009 @ 6:19 pm

6. I’ve done things to prepare for my death like a will but nothing close to a plot and tombstone. Interesting…

   Comment by ConnieFoggles — April 17, 2009 @ 9:10 pm

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